Monday, December 26, 2011

New Year, New plan

So the past month has been filled with family friends and carbs BUT the last 5 or so months has been looking at the same number on my scale +/- 5 lbs. I'm frustrated with my band. I'm frustrated with the war, my band doc deployed in October. I'm frustrated with the timing of this move to GA. I'm REALLY frustrated with the amount of begging I feel like I'm having to do to get some friggin health care. Just to catch anyone up, Hubby is in the military, we were in TX when I was banded and since he is deploying again soon *tear* I decided to move back home to GA. Our son has food/seasonal allergies, eczema and asthma that was just diagnosed and our daughter has minor diary allergies. This past summer I was diagnosed with food allergies to ALL meats including fish and shellfish, most beans, dairy and soy and half the damn vegetables grown on the planet.
back to the present Ever since that point, my diet has been screwed and my weight stalled. It's really hard to get in enough protein without some type of reaction, nothing deadly just big discomfort for a few days. I can't say it's worth it to eat something I know my body will react so negatively to.  Ya know what, we're family and everyone else discusses everything under the sun, I will too. I get bloating/gas/constipation/loose stools/itching hands/feet/mouth/palms mean/angry/bitchy/nauseous or some combination of all of these. With everything I've tried has some reaction whether I notice it right away or not. 

I went to the nutritionist with my list of allergies and we tried to work out some things that I could eat to maintain protein but it's hard when NO ONE else in this damn house will eat those things. It's hard enough making 2 meals because the kids are picky but to throw in a 3rd is just out of the damn question. I'm starting to believe the band is not for me. A lot of the things we came up with are things that don't agree with my band. With that and the stalled weight loss in mind, I'm leaning toward a revision to the gastric sleeve, limits quantity but not as sensitive to texture as the band. I know everyone is different but I see a bigger benefit, eat the things I need to and lose the weight I want, or stay fat, itchy and angry with the lap band.
So now the trouble with health care, the military base is not at it's capacity for patients and since we have 100% coverage they're refusing to send me into the city for care. I asked for a referral to a bariatric doc and dammit to hell they have one, so I'm stuck there too. My appt with them is Jan 9, doesn't seem so bad considering it's 25 Dec but I went to the doc 9 Dec for the referral o_O, had it been over 30 days they'd have to send me out, but noooooo, they HAD to have one appointment left just for me. I went to that department to find out about a fill and if they do flouroscopy and numb the injection site, big fat NO to both. Are you kidding me? My port is tilted, has always been and I've seen Dr Acheson fight to get the damn needle in, uh, there's no way they can go at me without anesthesia. I guess I'll have to talk to the surgeon about that too. The referring doc made note of my concern to switch to sleeve so the surgeon is supposed to check that out too. Since they don't do flouro, I"ll be scheduled a separate appointment to have a swallow study done then go back to the surgeon to follow up. It feels like a lot of wasted time and gas driving up there for something that would have been done in one visit in TX AT the damn base hospital (((grrrrrrrr))) The resources here are definitely limited, it's a training base, they don't have many civilians to see for care. It's mostly retirees, or old people, they don't have the need for upgrades and things because they are so used to caring for soldiers or people who don't have young children and other shit to do than wait 3 hours for an appointment. I'm seriously considering changing to 80% care and paying the difference, it will get the kids seen a hell of a lot quicker even if I have to drive across town for it. I'll revisit that idea after March when they've both gotten physicals and are up to date on vaccinations LOL

Thanks for reading all this, I had to get it off my brain, it is really causing me distress. I'm gonna go cuddle with my hubby for the next 13 days.


Wednesday, December 14, 2011

Hello World!!

So what had happened was my laptop died early November. Knowing that the move was coming and there were other things to spend on, I went without a computer. My cell was enough for basic stuff but writing a blog post wasn't happening. Tonight hubby and I left the kids with my sister and went Christmas shopping for the kids. We stopped for dinner and he suggested we walk around Best Buy, he's a nerd so wanting to go there wasn't odd. Once we were there he said 'You have $700, pick a computer' straight to the point but not romantic at all ;-) 

My weight dropped 7lbs during the week leading to the move but all 7 came back, brought friends AND TOM, not happy about that but I know that it was probably dehydration coupled htwith not eating AT ALL for 4   days, I lived on coffee. Once I started drinking again and trying to eat more regularly and TOM of course, the weight came back. It's really time to do measurements, I think for as long as I've been stalled the inches are gonna be the biggest reflection of good habits.

The new house is beautiful, the realtor we're renting through is a real bitch but that will get worked out I'm sure. If not by me, then hubby.
Thanks for sticking around during my radio silence :) It's probably gonna take me some time to get in the blogging habit but I am here now 


Thursday, October 27, 2011

Hello, anybody here?

I'm alive......just counting down the days til I get the hell outta Texas. Trying to do all the briefings we have to do with the Army to schedule movers and leave on post housing without too much incident or $. Not too much happening on the scale, I've been lucky to maintain at 222 despite the stress. I will be back, I promise.


Monday, September 12, 2011

a new month, no new season

Did Mother Nature miss a memo? Isn't Labor Day supposed to be the last weekend of summer? Why is it 106 degrees again? That broad is trippin' and I got suckered in to believing the cooler days from 10 days ago were here to stay. I'm not asking for much, 90-98 is fine with me, I wouldn't complain, for a few months at least.

Working out was going well, I had that week of total craziness and lost 6 lbs. I've committed to eating just what I need to be satisfied, not going overboard and if I think I want more, waiting 20-30 min before I make that move. Last week the organized working out was replaced by running around and primping for the Signal Ball. I should have the professional photo by the end of the week. Hubby looked so handsome in his dress uniform, I loves that man! My babies are still at Yai's house (grandma), they are having so much fun they don't even have time to talk to me :( I'm hoping to roll up to TN and kidnap my children back at the end of next week. 

Just wanted to give a quick update. 


Wednesday, August 31, 2011

working out

This morning I got up at 830 fixed a protein shake that rivals a Starbucks frappe and went to the gym. I walked the treadmill for 45 min at 3.2mph and 4.5 incline, that was crazy in an of it self but I needed to move my ass. Then I came home and did about 30 of the Insanity DVD's, that shit is INSANE!! I couldn't do all the moves or even last a minute on the ones I could do but I didn't stop moving. I had to sit for an hour before I showered because I was still sweating. Not damp shirt, bra, socks, I but having to mop my brow for new sweat beads before it gets into my eyes for a solid hour after I sat my ass still. IT FELT SO GOOD!!! I had heard about a Zumba-thon for an instructor that is leaving the area, it was at a gym in the city and would be free to the public. I did 2 hours of Zumba, on top of everything I did this morning, and I'm gonna do it again tomorrow. Maybe not the Zumba, although there is a class tomorrow night at my usual place, I think tomorrow will be the treadmill with a little jogging thrown in and then I'll come home and do pilates on Netflix.

The local weight loss group asked if we had any goals for September
1.  to go get my babies from grandma's house, I miss them sooooo much (it's been 3 weeks so far)
2.  to get back on track with eating
3. to continue exercising and hopefully start running, for real
4. to lose at least 15 lbs this month, REGARDLESS of TOM fluctuation I know I will gain 3-5lbs but it can go just as quickly as it came

I'm gonna beg hubby to massage my calves before we go to bed


Friday, August 26, 2011

7 month photos

Hi family, I suck at posting I know. Still stalled but inches are still moving. I took pics today :) As usual I'm in my daughters room. I keep thinking I should put those jackets in the closet but I never do it.......


Tuesday, August 9, 2011

Food Allergies

Does anyone have food allergies they work around with the band? Or find out about allergies AFTER being banded? I went a few weeks ago to the allergist to have them check for environmental stuff, my sinuses and breathing in general were awful. Standard for the office is to test the top 8 foods. . .  I reacted to all of them and all of the environmentals, 70+ items altogether. Well today, I went for a follow-up to be tested for the rest of the foods another 60+ items, all of them positive. They want me to do a food trial, cut things out for 2 weeks then add them back in one at a time. Sounds good in theory. We agreed to do the ones with highest reaction first, 4-5 at a time.

What the hell am I supposed to eat now? Beef, pork, chicken, fish, shrimp, peanuts, dairy, soy and wheat/rye/barley are either in everything and/or the best ways I've learned to get my protein. I'm frustrated, scared, confused, lost and most of all PISSED. I went through surgery to help me lose weight and now I'm scared my tool is going to have to be taken away because I can't eat band friendly things. I've scheduled an appt with the nutritionist, Ruth, for next Tuesday. Hopefully, she can point me in the right direction and help me not to survive on gummy bears since sugar seems to be the only thing I can eat. WTF is that about, FML!!


Wednesday, July 27, 2011

Hi there

Hey everyone! How the hell are ya?! I've been kinda at a loss for words but I'm still working my band.  I went to support group and weighed in at 223!! Hot damn, that's 7 lbs since the last time I went, officially my lowest weight. I'm excited, it's the same weight and 1 pant size smaller than when I met my husband. He has absolutely noticed *wink, wink*

I've been working at Lane Bryant again, so far just 1-2 days a week and that's enough for me. It's pocket change, discounted clothes for the shrinking and something to do til we move back to GA at the end of the year. Yes, yes ya'll I'm going home!! I'm so happy to get out of TX, I can't stand this heat, 28 straight days of temps above 100! Somebody tell Mother Nature I'm gonna kick her ass if we don't get a break and some damn rain!! I can't make myself go anywhere near a gym and I'm not disciplined enough to work out at home so what's a girl to do. I tried some pilates on netflix yesterday, I didn't like the instructor. I'm probably gonna end up playing some music and muting the tv. At least 10 min of pilates will tighten some things up, not sure how to get cardio in, I know that I know that I know I will NOT do that at home. Maybe sex can substitute, I"ll have to tell hubby 3x a week so I can keep my cardiovascular fitness up :)

My NSV's for this past month, my size 18 jeans are loose, even after washing, I have to wear a belt with them AND my belt is 5 holes tighter than when I started this journey. Work was doing a special and I got a pair of the new jeggings in a 14, my intention is to wear them once the weather breaks but the 16 felt too loose to last that long. OMG a 14!! I haven't worn a 14 since.........hell I don't remember, that's an NSV in itself!

Ok friends, til next time


Thursday, July 14, 2011

I'm alive. . . barely

*Intense whining ahead*

I'm alive, just feeling like crap. I had allergy testing June 23 and ain't been right since. 2 weeks ago I started snotting, ok, summer cold I can handle this. then I started coughing, ugh, I hate this cough is dry and unproductive. I can't sleep, I can barely walk to the car cuz i'm coughing so much. I go to the doc and they're like 'Oh, it's just an allergy attack here's an inhaler, steroid and decongestant. You'll be fine in a few days' Uh, no. It's a frigging week later on meds and 2 weeks since the start of this crap, I'm not fine, if anything I'm worse. The cough is making me gag and my left eye looks suspiciously like conjunctivitis. I think I have lung-junk-tivitis. somebody better figure this shit out, I'm so tired of being sick and tired. I guess it's not all bad, my weight is still dropping, about 1.5lb a week since last TOM. That's usually when I gain, and the past 2 months had been ridiculous, I didn't gain but I couldn't lose either. Anywho, I went to a doc yesterday and he says it's allergies but it's more like allergic asthma, that's why I'm coughing so much and here's another Rx. This time it's Singulair, I think this is probably the better one as opposed to the decongestant. This morning I wake up coughing up my guts, spitting bubbles, it was so much like the frothy crap that comes before a PB, it was miserable. I have my Pharmacy Tech final tomorrow, I cannot walk in there tomorrow morning cradling a trashcan, that would not be cool. I think I'm done whining now, my weight is still dropping, I'm drinking plenty water because the meds are drying me out so bad and it's been 105 outside for the past 2 weeks. I'm so excited to hopefully be on my way back to GA at the end of the year, if I could fast forward 4 months, it would be better weather in TX and I'd be that much closer to going home and being a place with friends and family and a life outside of the military.

the military lifestyle is overrated


Sunday, June 19, 2011

Photo update

4.5 month pics, 35lbs down

grey sweats and black top are most recent photos
all 3 pants are the same size just diff colors. I definitely see a change in the fit :)

Monday, June 13, 2011

Clothing purge

I'm going through clothes right now. I've got some LB and Catherine's pieces. Once I get some organization happening I'll take pictures and post descriptions. See ya soon

Sunday, June 5, 2011


After that public pep-talk I have been seeing results, I hit the 220s and have been steadily dropping, I'm down to 227! That's 3lbs in 7 days, just working the band like I should. Eating and not drinking, paying REAL attention to when I'm not hungry anymore and getting my water in each and every day. I'm proud of myself and I hope that my public declaration of my commitment to myself continues to stay in my mind and be that voice in my head htat I need to keep moving forward and downward.



Monday, May 30, 2011

Why did I do this. . .

I just read a post over at Maria's that hit a nerve. She talks about the need to reset ourselves to continue to go towards our goals. I've hit a weight that I've been comfortable in before and because of the familiarity with this place that I haven't been a good bandster because I'm 'OK' at this weight. I did not have major surgery to become complacent after losing 30lbs, if that's all I really wanted to do, why bother? So like Maria said, I need to reset, mind and body to get into the groove of reaching my goal weight. 30lbs is indeed an accomplishment but it is not the end of my quest for better health (and better shopping).

I know I have some fears about loose skin that have already become reality but I honestly can't say I'm surprised. My thighs are a mess!! I've always had large thighs even when I was 120lbs 15 years ago, my mom has big thighs. She had GB 18mos ago has lost 150lbs and she wears spanx to hold it all together. I'm sad to know that's probably my future because I can't imagine having to wear spanx thru the TX summer but dammit if it helps my smaller clothes look better on my shrinking body, I'll do what I have to do.

So to Maria and anyone else in reset mode, let's do this! We have lived with this weight long enough to decide that we had had enough of carrying it around and had surgery to help the process. It's time to work with this band, minimize the self sabotage and let the weight and it's grip on our self-perception go!

I want to propose a toast *to us, getting even more healthy* 


Happy still

I went to class this past Friday and got a 101 on my quiz!! I studied my butt off, it was a lot of material AND we had a sub. Who the hell has a sub in college?! That was some weird stuff but it was nice to have a different perspective and teaching style. I went Thursday for a followup/fill and ended up getting just barely .5cc. Under flouro it was pretty obvious that if I had anymore of a fill I wouldn't be able to eat, that means it is sup to me to get my ass in gear and really do this thing. I know my biggest problem is breaking the habit of eating and drinking. I have been trying to not even have a drink nearby when I eat to avoid the impulse to sip. A couple days of that has already proven to be FABULOUS, I'm down to 228 this morning, that's 3lbs from Thursday at the docs office AND while Tom was in town! I felt like poop Thursday after my appt and the light bulb finally came on Friday morning, I hadn't been drinking enough. Friday morning after 10 or so hours of sleep I still felt like hell. I grabbed a gatorade on the way to school and felt so much better. I've been conscious of maintaining hydration, I drink 3-4 16.9 oz bottles of water each day and maybe 8-10oz of other stuff and its obviously working since the scale is moving again.

This week I'm going to work on a baby quilt for a shower June 11 and this Friday is my birthday! Hopefully it won't be too stressful since I'll be spending the bulk of it in the classroom. My professor said she'll make this one of our pizza days and use school $ to feed us, I'm gonna take cupcakes. There are only 8 of us in this class I feel comfortable sharing this with them, after all it is my 30th birthday. Our plan is to go to an early movie Saturday and that's it, no parties, no alcohol (maybe), just hubby and the kids. A quiet day doing the one thing I really wanna do and it allows us to be a couple for a few hours then we can come home and be a family of 4. I think Saturday would be a good day for progress photos, I'm sure there has to be a visual difference by now!


Friday, May 20, 2011

pleasant surprise

My body must have listened to my whining complaining and such yesterday, I stepped on the scale this morning and saw 231.4!! 2 whole pounds lower than my lowest to date and a few from what I'd been fighting for 3 weeks! *happy dance, happy dance* Zumba felt great this evening, I pumped it up and did a lot more of the jumping than I usually do. That was a surprise in itself since it's rainy-ish and my knees usually hurt like hell when it rains.

Just wanted to give a quick update. I need to get my butt to bed, I have class in the morning.


Thursday, May 19, 2011

ya know. . .

I think I lost a post. I've been so sporadic at posting anything I'm not even sure if that's true. Let's see, ummmm I"m still holding on to weight from TOM in APRIL and now TOM is upon me for May so let the water retention begin. It's frustrating to be so mindful of my eating, I feel like I might be on the tip of my green zone but I'll see my doc next week to talk about it. Working out is picking up again, I finally got my ass on the Wii Fit after almost 18months 2 days for about 30 min each time, (planks are a bitch!) Zumba Tues/Thurs and hour each AND I went to the Zumba Pajama Jammer Saturday night. It was frigging 3 hours of dancing in a poorly circulating skating rink, which means I sweat my ass off, literally, my pj bottoms were falling when I did the shimmy. I believe my ass has made its departure, hopefully it will come back as buns of steel with some roundness :)

I ended up not doing the 5K Saturday in my city, I horsed around with hubby and when he tossed me to the couch I landed wrong and had a nice bruise on my hip. It didn't really bother me til I did Zumba but dammit did it hurt after class! I decided it was easier to move around in a gym than to walk 3 mi through downtown where I wasn't sure of the route and stuff.

Well, what else? Hubby is taking classes or something for work and if he snaps at me one mo'gin, he gon' wake up missing an eyebrow or something! I hate when his work consumes him that way, he becomes such a prick, I'm tolerant in the beginning, when he gets quiet but he seems to always start talking before he's gotten over his pissy-spell, and that's when the storm begins. I hope it passes quickly. Now that I know he's in a classroom all day, I can modify my goings ons to make sure he has quick breakfast/lunch foods since he hardly gets a lunch break and I can make more effort to cook something healthy and hearty for dinner, be the housewife of his dreams for a week or so. I'm accommodating.......sometimes. Honestly ya'll I suck at this housewife thing, I had never considered staying home until I was pregnant with my son, it was nice the first 2 years. He was 18mos when I got pregnant with my daughter, ok, another year home, I can handle it. It'll be fun getting to see their relationship evolve. And it has been, but now they seem to be in a routine with each other, she is saying new words each day and I'm ready to go to work. I feel selfish for wanting to run away but me time should not be the hours between 10p-1a. Can I get some daylight hours to be Rahshell and put my Mommy hat on the shelf? July 29, can't come soon enough, classes will be over and I will have registered to take the PTCB. Hopefully I'll be working in the time between finishing class and taking the test. We'll see how that goes. I had my 2nd midterm last week, not sure what my grade is yet but that's part of the reason I've been short on posts. Reading up for class this Friday is why I'm up now. good gracious it's midnight!!


Monday, May 9, 2011

March for Babies

* I know I've been MIA, I hadn't really had much to say. I started this post on my cell riding back from Austin :)*

It went well!! Karen and I met up with a few other ladies for the drive to Austin. We got to the location problem free and were raring to go. The Mothers Milk Bank had a nice setup for nursing and some changing tables, of course the table with information about breastfeeding.  A little after 9am the ladies from the bank were ready to get going, we left with the second wave. The walk was through downtown Austin and we pretty much strolled and did some sightseeing. We took about 90min to complete the course. The hills on Congress and Lavaca were f*%$ing stupid but the start and finish on the bridge was pretty. I got my MMB tshirt and was pleasantly surprised, it's an XL and has slack around my hips!! We're gonna do the walk this coming Saturday in Killeen and this time I'll take my family along. Hopefully hubby will get some good pictures of us.

Y'all, I have never participated in anything like this and I have no experience with losing a child or having on in NICU. The emotion and love and support was palpable, almost overwhelming. There were signs at the chute that had words from parents to their angels and my gosh it was so touching. Karen's friend had lost a baby this January and she broke down and cried, I couldn't remember her name all day but I felt so protective of her, primal, like her pain was mine and I took it personally. At some point we all teared up. It was emotional and cleansing and it makes me feels so proud of the parents and babies who have fought long and hard to be healthy and it made me feel blessed to have my healthy children. I learned the March of Dimes is in support of ALL babies, full-term, pre-term, with and without health concerns and their goal is to see babies born healthy, and to support the families of those babies. I feel like I'm rambling so I'm gonna go. Check out the pics :) The Brylie is the doll I'm walking for, Karen had her at 29 weeks, she is 6 months old now

After the March

Monday, April 25, 2011


I've got 2 pairs of denim capris size 24, one Old Navy the other Lane Bryant, anybody want them? I'm a whole 5 ft tall and the ON pair hit my ankle, I cuffed them twice to make them look like capris on me, they also have a lot of stretch and give during the day. the LB pair are still kinda long on me, maybe low calf area, funny looking but short enough to not look like floods LOL they have a cuff that's about 1.5 in, and both pair are a medium wash, kinda like this. Leave a comment and I'll email you for your address, if there's multiple replies, I'll use or if there's only 2 replies, I'll post pictures and let y'all decide. I'll try to take some pics of them tomorrow anyway.

On my hotsexymama quest, I've PB'd 2x since my last fill, first time I was probably eating too fast but the second time I'm not so sure. I took a bite, chased a kid, took another bite and got all slimy and sick and stuff. I'm torn between thinking it's too tight and not tight enough, it varies day to day and it's a big variance. Some days, I haven't been able to tolerate white meats AT ALL, no matter the preparation, it could be stewed and I'd still feel choked up. On other days I can eat whatever I want. It's one hell of a learning curve. I was expecting TOM last weekend and felt like hell and doggonit I checked my calendar and it's not due til this week. Energy is low, sleep is terrible and I've not been working out like I should. However, I do bench press the baby LOL I think she's put on a few pounds, my arms are sore after our session today. It's crazy how I've incorporated the kids into my little moments of strength training. I put my son across my lap and do leg raises for lower abs, I hold Liv over my head and 'bench press' her. Joe will lay on the floor with me and do yoga moves. He get so excited for me to 'move my body' it's such a great motivator and I know I'm being that example for him and Liv to lead active lifestyles.

don't forget about the March for Babies 5K in Austin May 7. Ya'll pray I get some mileage in this week, I'm feeling weak, hips hurting and such. I know I need to make sure my body is primed for this event, I do not want to embarrass myself LOL

Thursday, April 21, 2011

I found my 5K

A friend and I walked yesterday for Shaken Baby Awareness. It was barely a mile but it felt good to walk for a cause. In October, she delivered a beautiful baby girl at 28 weeks. Last night she invited me to walk with her for March of Dimes. Absolutely!! The walk is May 7 in Austin, TX. We joined a team, Mother's Milk Bank of Austin, this is a group she has donated milk to for the past 2 years. As part of joining the team we had to pledge to bring in donations. I said $100, so if you'se guys would help me out reaching this goal, it would go to a very worthwhile cause.

 Visit my page and give a dollar or 5.

Thanks a bunch

Tuesday, April 19, 2011


I'm still around, I just haven't had anything to say. TOM is coming and I'm focusing on not letting the pms get me down. Maybe if hubby comes in early enough I'll go for a 'wog' :) I haven't done any mileage this week.

Thursday, April 14, 2011

Odd sensation

Ever feel like your fill isn't working?  Like maybe you were unfilled a bit but it was done under flouro and you drank lthe junk to check things out. I am having the damndest time with ALL white meats, pork chicken etc, but that started before fill 2. Now the scale has gone up to 237, has been there since Monday. I'm befuddled. Guess it's time to journal my foods again.

Saturday, April 9, 2011

Wogging :)

my version of walking and jogging

I went to the gym yesterday, 1mi on the treadmill and 2mi on the bike! I was having a frustrating Friday and usually the gym time would make me feel better but nope. This morning I was still kinda grumpy and Hubby suggested we go out for breakfast, eh ok. That went ok, then the boy wanted to walk around 'the circle' aka Target :) Cracker Barrel is in the same shopping plaza.

I decided this evening that I wanted to go out for a 'run' again. Hubby was like, sure, do your thing. I wanted to do the 2.2mi loop but ended up doing 1.56. The first stretch of road doesn't have sidewalks and lots of rocks in the grass because of construction going on, I started jogging and stepped on a rock and almost rolled my ankle. I have weak ankles to begin with so that made the next stretch tough. I decided to turn one corner sooner just to ensure I didn't get caught far from home in a lot of pain. Anywho, I headed back and found some sidewalk :D that made me really happy so I jogged a bit more. The next corner was HELL into the wind and uphill for 1/4mile, I had to push . . . hhhhard. It was one hell of a way to finish up a quick walk. Took me right at 30 minutes, so I feel my time was pretty good. Maybe I should sign up for the 5k that's coming up, hold on let me check the date.......*insert Jeopardy theme music* Aww hell, it's next weekend. Not confident I can do the distance without crapping out : / To be honest with myself, I'm scared of not finishing. We'll see, I might grow a pair and register online this week, or not.

The scale is holding tight at 235, this is one hell of a place to have a plateau. Note to self, can I get these 2lbs off to meet my 30 lbs goal, please, pretty please.

Tuesday, April 5, 2011

why is this so hard?

Last week was a fantastic visit from my mom, I haven't worked out since the week before she came. we did a bit of the wii cardio boxing but eh, it wasn't a zumba class. I really need to get out and run!! I didn't go to zumba tonight because the little lady was asleep, I know she's a beast if you wake her and we ran errands ALL DAY LONG so she hadn't napped at all. No way was I gonna leave that crabby patty with the childcare at the gym. I got dressed to go for a run for when hubby got home, but we are now 3 hours dressed and no sign of hubby. Little lady is up from her nap, little dude has eaten twice and I'm still waiting to burn some real calories. UGH!!! Tomorrow hubby is getting Lasik, so that means I need to be calm for obvious reasons. I've gotta get both kids to daycare on opposite sides of town and make it to my fill appointment too. I really need a run, a trip to the gym, a treadmill, a track, a few (30+) minutes to myself to get centered and work up a sweat. I never thought getting a workout in would be this complicated.

The fill appointment probably won't result in a fill since my weight loss has been pretty steady per my scale. Since I'll already be at the hospital with hubby, I'm keeping my appt, it's just on another floor.

~til next time

Friday, April 1, 2011

Back to Reality.... Friday?

I had class this morning but before I got dressed I had to see if all the fun times and hanging out this week had any affect on the scale. It did, in a good way, I am down to 236 this morning!!! That's 3 lbs from 30 lbs down from the rude awakening of seeing 263 on the scale in October. My next fill appointment is scheduled for Wednesday afternoon, I know I probably won't get a fill but it sure will be nice to step on their very official scale and have this victory typed into my medical record :)

Eating is good, slow but satisfying and my choices are reasonable. Today, I ran to the Shoppette(the gas station on the base) and grabbed a Lunchable and Grandma's peanut butter cookies, you know they come in packs of 2. It probably took me 30 min to eat but whatever, I ate 1 cookie with lunch (mmmm, it was delicious!)  The other one on my ride to pick up my Liv from the sitter, 3 hours after our lunch break. Now it's time for dinner and I'm getting a little hungry. But I kind of hoped hubby would have been home by now so we could go out for dinner *sigh* not so lucky today.

On another note, OMG learning all the drugs, actions and categories is going to melt my brain!! Does it ever get easier?!

*LCK glad you stopped by, it's great to still have your support! You helped me get this process started, thank you.

Tuesday, March 29, 2011

quick update

Hey quick update. I went to the doc the other day and lost another 2 lbs!! It looks like I'm 2 to 2.5 a week since my fill. *big cheesy face* Looks like my fill is at a great space, I hope it lasts until I'm too skinny to have it work for me :) I hear the band loosens as weight is lost.

I'm at 237!

Sunday, March 27, 2011

Ask and ye shall receive

damn (.) came last night  :( It's not so late, when I checked my account ( everything seems normal again. I guess I'll keep an eye on things.

My posts will be sparse this week as my mom is visiting :)


Thursday, March 24, 2011

I forgot to say

I'm officially official, I PB'd last night for the first time. It started with tightness in my chest that usually means I need to slow down. I asked hubby for a sip of his drink then said nope that's not gonna work. Baby girl was standing on my foot since I was feeding her from my plate, I was trapped and couldn't stand without knocking her down. He says are you gonna throw up, by now all I can do is nod. He dumps out a bin we use as a toy box that's friggin HUGE and thrusts it at me like I'm gonna spew copious amounts. I burp and a mouthful of pork fried rice and that sip of root beer come back up. He's grabbed the kid and is screaming Go go before more comes up. Uh, dude, I'm done. He's baffled. Speechless and I start giggling. After vomiting from week 5-week 40 of both pregnancies, that was a friggin walk in the park!!! He's still confused. then says, well go clean that out before it starts to smell or something. I'm hysterically laughing because he is not a man to be short on shit-talk and he's so at a loss.
fast forward to tonight:

Him: I don't understand why that's called a productive burp. Isn't a burp already productive because gas comes out?
Me: Well, that's the name for it in the lap band community, productive burp or PB
Him: That's just gross, PB my ass. That wasn't a burp, if food comes up that's straight vomit!
Me: laughing, you know I'm gonna blog about this
Him: Yeah, probably. Just make sure you spell my name right!

who is this crazy man in my house, I probably couldn't eat my damn rice for laughing at him last night. My Mommy will be here this Friday!!!

Ok, I'm gonna go to bed, there's a zumba class at 1pm. I hear it's not as crowded AND child care is still provided on site. If it's lame, I'll be at the 530p class to make up for it :)

night ya'll

Tuesday, March 22, 2011

*witty title here*

I did Zumba today. I missed class last Saturday, there was a 5K that I had forgotten about so class was cancelled. I really felt like a newbie all over again! Whhhhhyyyyyy?!? It makes me sad and more determined to be there 3x's a week this week, I have got to keep up.

On another note, I went to support group this morning with my girl Jo, she's considering surgery. She was initially thinking band but at group she learned about sleeve. I love the group conversation, it is for all the procedures so she learned about sleeve this morning. There is an official weigh in at EVERY group and I'm 237.8 on their scale!! That's 5 lbs in 2 weeks, last weigh in was the day of my fill. On the form we fill out each visit, there is a line item that asks for an NSV, I was able to tighten my belt 3 notches from pre-op weight :-)

I'm gonna ask ya'll like I asked the group this morning: anybody have wonky periods after surgery? My first (.) post op was almost 10 days late. It's past time for the next and I don't feel achy, crampy, pms-y or anything. Whaddya think?

Saturday, March 19, 2011

Vaccinations Suck!!

Baby girl got shots around 3 pm yesterday. She's been a raging fool ever since. Today my big boy has an allergic reaction to what must have been Life and hes itchy and whiny. No one has a fever and they only act crazy with me. AND today was hubby's day out, alone so I've been dealing with this solo, ugh I need a bottle of moscato . . .

Friday, March 18, 2011

I missed. . .

Zumba. I'm pretty sad about it but I have good reason,  we spent ALL DAMN day at the Automax and finally took home a 2011 Ford Escape! Im so excited it's my first brand new car, she only had 36 miles and some of that was my test drive. It stunk that I missed zumba but hello I needed to eat and settle a bit before that cardio. As it was, we skipped lunch and snacked on free drinks, krispy creams and split 2 string cheese sticks 3 ways. Hubby was a real trooper he's never bought a car with financing and a trade in. And my sweet baby girl was just hanging out and greeting folks like it was her job. We spent a total of maybe 7 hours there. It was about 630 when we got home, starving and frustrated at the stupid car buying process. I have cpr class in the am so I miss yoga too dangit! I'll be shaking my booty in zumba Saturday and hopefully I can get a swim in this weekend too. I need to keep moving so as not to lose momentum.

The scale made me smile this evening,  I didn't weigh this morning because it's hard to see the end of day higher. I saw 238.2 as a bedtime weight!! That's lower than my lowest morning :-) I'm tempted to see what the scale says in the morning but i'd hate to ruin my high. I'll try to hold out til tomorrow night. . . .we'll see


Tuesday, March 15, 2011


Tonight I went to Zumba, yesterday I did yoga. I'm frigging tired and sore and I'll be in the living room tomorrow with my 3lb weights working on my arms and back. I don't necessarily think I've made it to -aholic status but dammit I feel good after working out. I gets antsy over the weekends if I don't do something. It's definitely a good thing, now to see some results on the scale.........

Sunday, March 13, 2011

I just noticed

I have 10 whole followers!! Thanks for reading me, it makes me smile to know my ramblings are entertaining someone other than myself  :) I suck at commenting on others blogs but I do read them, I read too many probably 30 or so. I'm still tryna get them all updated to RSS so they show on the side bar.
Thanks for being here


Saturday, March 12, 2011

It moved

In the right direction finally!  The scale, it went down!  I hit 239 the other day but floated back up to 243 where I hovered before. Yesterday I weighed 242 and this morning. . . 238.8!! My lowest to date, this is how much I weighed the day I had my daughter, a year and 2 weeks ago.

I know y'all say feeling a fill takes time and I understand this could be residual swelling but for right now,   I'm in a great place. Yesterday started with a was myoplex chocolate shake with 25g protein, lunch was a small blt cobb salad from Wendy's, dinner was a small chili. I bought the 2 for 4.99 at lunch. We finished lunch about 1230 and I wasn't hungry until 530. I don't think I've just not been hungry that long before, it was a great realization.

I'm taking lil dude to a birthday party this afternoon and we haven't gotten a gift yet :-o so we're gonna spend some mother/son time looking for something.

Have a fantastic weekend


Friday, March 11, 2011


I think I've found my new thing!! It's so much fun but kicks my butt so hard. I'm really feeling some kind of pitiful right now. Haven't decided if I'm gonna drag my ass-parts to class in the morning.


Wednesday, March 9, 2011


I'm typing on my phone plz forgive any typos.

Dr A did a good fill, 4.5ccs. He says I have the standard band so I'm guessing 10cc total. It was pretty cool and not as uncomfortable as I thought it would be. He uses flouroscopy and a local anesthetic. I felt the pop as he hit the port but nothing else. I'm waiting the standard 30 min before Olivia and I leave, and so far no problems drinking my water.

Tuesday, March 8, 2011

Beautiful day of NSV's

This morning, 239.8 on the scale, that was a great start to my day. I had a date with a friend to go to Zumba for the first time tonight at 6, Oh Hell Yes, that was fantastic!! I never imagined I'd enjoy it so much, I have this thing about shaking my ass in front of dudes lifting weights. We used the main gym floor, so on both sides of this HUGE class there were soldiers doing the regular gym stuff, facing us :-/ It was incredible and there were a few ladies in front of us that were also instructors so their hollering and motivation was contagious. I can't wait to do it again, I will be there Thursday night and again Saturday morning. THEN since I was all amp'd up when class was over, I went to the track and ran. Do you hear me, I RAN! I haven't run since high school maybe college, I know I'm gonna pay for it tomorrow but I am ecstatic that I was able to run a complete lap, I walked a 2nd one and then went home on a natural high.

Tomorrow I get my first fill, I can't wait to see how my body responds to the fill plus the exercising. I'm all smiles.


Monday, March 7, 2011

A few pictures

I finally took some pictures! Nothing major just a few profile shots at 38 days and one at 5 days post op. Pardon my living room, I've got small kids remember :)
Here goes

5 days post op

 38 days/5 weeks  
38 days/5 weeks 

Saturday, March 5, 2011


I know ya'll are thinking I got a few readers and quit writing. Nah, that's not it, it's just been a whole lotta life happening .

It all started Tuesday morning when the little one woke with fever, she's a clingy, crying mess when she's sick so that was a cuddle day. Wednesday, the same thing, fever, fussing, clinging, blech, I'm ready for this illness to be done. Thursday no fever but dstill crying and clinging to me, I cannot stand to have a kid that screams if she's not being held, that's a fate worse than death to me. I mean, I couldn't put her down at my feet to stir a pot, it was insane. Thursday evening, daycare calls at 5:15 saying my son has pink-eye and it's been draining all day. Uh, HELLO if it's been draining all day, why did you wait til the end of the fracking day to call and say something is wrong!? I can't make an appointment on post after 4 pm and that's on a prayer we'll get a same day appt in the after hours clinic and I HAVE A MIDTERM TOMORROW!! Cheese and crackers it was frustrating. I told hubby he was gonna have to go to work late, I have got to take my test, BTW I got an 86 :) Friday, I take the baby to my friend who watches her when I'm in class and go take my test. Hubby takes the boy to check on his eye, yuck, it is pinkeye and he has drops. My day started at 7am and since I don't work that was too early. I came home and both kids took naps, instead of me resting, I worked out. Yay me, Gold's Gym, Cardio on the Wii is awesome! Towards the end of the session a girlfriend calls and we end up eating at Cheddars(junk) walking through Target and it's after 9pm when the kids and I get home. I'm beyond tired and the weekend has just begun. Today I started with getting my nails done at 10, I hit Walmart for groceries, and searched Hobby Lobby AND Dollar General looking for a $500 bill refrigerator magnet, no luck. After a quick shower about 1:30, I hit a Tupperware party at 2, a baby shower at 2:30 and then hit 2 stores to window shop with the same friend from last night. Again I got home after 9 tonight. Tomorrow, I'm taking the boy to a birthday party at a bowling alley at 330, I'm so glad that's later in the day, but I've RSVP'd for a Army Wives viewing party at 730, so we know I'll be out til after 9 yet again.

In the midst of all of this, my eating has been crap but the scale hasn't moved any more than the 2 lbs that have been flopping around every day for the past couple weeks. I have realized I'm drinking when I eat, what started as a sip became a full on glass 'o water while I'm eating. My hunger comes back within 2 hours, and that has got to stop. So as I step away from the meal/beverage combo, I'm mentally preparing myself for my first fill and 2 days of liquids. I'm really excited to get this fill, I can really feel a difference between the post op restriction and now. I'm able to eat whatever though not as much BUT it's still not as much as I could or would eat pre-band. Thank goodness my self control has tried to hang in there despite the eating and drinking.

Geez, I've typed a whole novel!! I'm gonna watch the rest of Iron Chef and go to bed, it's been a long few days and it's not over yet


Friday, March 4, 2011

Thank you!!

Good morning everyone! Before getting lost in this midterm, I wanted to say thank you so much for the  support!! Uh oh she's passing out the test fingers crossed!

Wednesday, March 2, 2011

Measurements/Weight 1 Month Post-op

I haven't shared my weight and tonight we took my measurements :) My clothes are fitting really differently and that has made me not so concerned about the actual number on the scale moving. The journey began with an appointment to my PCM in late October, I weighed 263. WTF?! I'm only 5 ft tall, how the hell did I get up to 263 from 240 not 3 months before! In that appointment I asked about bariatric surgery, my ever supportive doc said absolutely, she supports my decision and if I need further referrals to just send her an email to skip having to wait for the office visit (remember I'm an Army wife). November I got the phone call from a hospital about 45 min away, they'd gotten my referral and I need to get a psych eval, go to support group, nutritionist, the usual stuff. I couldn't attend any of the support groups until the psych eval was done, I thought that was stupid. I get the referral to psych and that same week I get a call from the army hospital that the military docs who are trained in bariatric surgeries (all 4 of them) were returning from deployment and I have the option of doing everything there. After the info session on base, I was sold on doing it here instead of 45 min away. I had every requirement met before Christmas except attending support group. Jan 12 I went to group and Jan 28 I was banded.

I'm kicking myself that I didn't take measurements at the start because I'm certain there are a good many inches gone since then.

Highest Weight - 263
Current Weight - 241
Goal Weight - 170
My weight hasn't moved in probably 2 weeks, it stalled right when (.) was supposed to show. It was 2 weeks late and that's odd in and of itself. Hopefully once it ends, my weight will start to drop again.

Bust - 38, down from 42
Waist - 43
Hips - 51, they've been 51 since HS
L Thigh - 30
R Thigh - 33(weird I know)
L Arm - 16.5
R Arm - 16.5


Tuesday, March 1, 2011


I'm having trouble eating enough calories each day. I'm kinda scared to start working out because that will further emphasize the deficit. What to do, what to do?

Sunday, February 27, 2011


Today was my first day back to work. It was fun, I enjoyed it, but I'm not quite sure I want to work at all.

I quit a full time job to be a stay at home mommy oh ... 4 years ago. I had a part time gig at Lane Bryant before quitting so I always had something to do. Jan '08 our son was born and 8 months later we moved to TX. I hadn't worked at all since being here until this past November when I started working for Lane Bryant again. I figured it would be good for a few dollars through the holiday season. I dunno, maybe 2 kids and 2+ years changed me but I don't think I'm cut out for retail anymore, or maybe I outgrew it.

Before, I was a maniac shopper, I have more clothes in my closet than I have reason to wear, it doesn't help that my employee discount is 40% either. So back to today, I worked I looked at all the pretty things and felt out of place. I didn't want to look through those things and find the perfect item for me. It feels wrong to shop, I can see the future and clothes from LB aren't there. I'm not gonna lie, the spring line is really pretty and I can't wait to buy new bras and panties but clothes are not a priority.
Last year my mom had gastric bypass, she was a size smaller than me last spring, now she's dropped 2 more sizes. When she visits next month, I'm getting her summer stuff. I have no reason to shop for clothes, between the things I have and the things she's bringing, I'm set til probably a size 14. I'm currently a 22.

I feel like I'm rambling but I guess I needed to get this out. Hi, I'm a shopaholic that doesn't want to shop for myself. I'm really excited to go through my closet and pull out things that are too big. I'm all for sending clothes to someone who needs it next. Since most of my stuff is LB it's hard for me to donate, I'd rather give them directly to someone, those clothes have a special place in my heart. That's probably why I have so many clothes, in so many sizes, taking up so much space......


Saturday, February 26, 2011

Frozen meals

Today I went to Walmart and saw they have GV brand Lean Cuisine type frozen meals. Hmmmm, now a lot of times I don't really fret over name brands, hell I don't even like LC's, they're bland. But since they were  near the Healthy Choice meals, that I do like, I took a chance and purchased a couple. I hope they are good, they're only a buck fifty, 300 calories and 15g protein.

As far as food journaling goes, I ate 1192 1 day and 1248 the next, not bad I think.

til next time

Friday, February 25, 2011

the hunger

Hi there, I'm back :) The trip to the vet was crazy like I said it would be, thank goodness my dog is pretty well behaved I don't think I could have done it otherwise. I expected her to weigh around 75lbs and she came in at . . .87lbs!!! OMG my poor Mokah, her joints have to be on fire. She is now on a Mommy-imposed diet. The Vet didn't even come in the room, no one mentioned her weight a tech gave her the vaccinations and sent us on our way :/ WTF I honestly expected someone to say something about her being so heavy. Maybe I'm projecting on her, any doc I saw always said something about mine.

For me and my still unnamed band, I've decided to journal my food. I'm not sure if I am gonna post it here or if I can stay honest with myself on paper. I'm thinking to stay between 1100-1300 and see how that goes for me.  I weighed 240 this morning and I've been writing 2 days worth. How do I figure out the calories of meals made from scratch? I used all fresh ingredients last night so that hasn't been written in. Today I ate packaged foods and stayed very conscious of calories and protein but feel hungry a lot sooner. I'm befuddled. I haven't had my first fill, that's scheduled March 9, oh snap that's in less than 2 weeks!! I'll be about 6.5 weeks PO. I'm guessing since my hunger returns in 2.5-3 hours Dr Acheson might be conservative with my fill. I dunno, he doesn't do the support groups, those are run by the Nutritionist. Hell I didn't meet the man (very handsome, southern man) until my pre-op appointment, oh 2 days before surgery. Gotta love the military.

I'm gonna go figure out what to have for an actual dinner, I don't wanna blow my calories on snacking.


Wednesday, February 23, 2011

so, what the French.... toast?!

 my weight was up last night to 243 and this morning it's 240 aarrrggghhhhh. I know it's not supposed to be some super fast change but jeez louise the flip flopping can be really disheartening. Today my lovely little lady, O and I are taking Mokah, our chocolate lab, to the vet on base. This should be (f'ing insane) interesting. It's nap time and it's gloomy as all hell outside. Oh!! Let's not forget they don't usually allow children in the vet so there's no way I'm using a stroller. So I'll be wrangling an 80lb dog while wearing my daughter in a all at 27 days post op

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Hello Bandland!!

Hello world!! I've been a blog lurker for years and it's feeling like time to start one of my own. I had lap band surgery Jan 28 2011 and I'm feeling great! This morning I hit a new low, 239.8 and my NSV was putting my belt on a tighter loop!! My starting weight was 258 and that was before the pre-op diet, so that was around the new year.

Other stuff :
Uh, I have a husband of 4 years 2 kids and a dog. We're a military family and I'm praying we get to leave Texas soon, our families are too far away and we're all allergic to this place, including the dog :/