Monday, December 26, 2011
Wednesday, December 14, 2011
Thursday, October 27, 2011
Monday, September 12, 2011
Wednesday, August 31, 2011
The local weight loss group asked if we had any goals for September
1. to go get my babies from grandma's house, I miss them sooooo much (it's been 3 weeks so far)
2. to get back on track with eating
3. to continue exercising and hopefully start running, for real
4. to lose at least 15 lbs this month, REGARDLESS of TOM fluctuation I know I will gain 3-5lbs but it can go just as quickly as it came
I'm gonna beg hubby to massage my calves before we go to bed
Friday, August 26, 2011
Tuesday, August 9, 2011
What the hell am I supposed to eat now? Beef, pork, chicken, fish, shrimp, peanuts, dairy, soy and wheat/rye/barley are either in everything and/or the best ways I've learned to get my protein. I'm frustrated, scared, confused, lost and most of all PISSED. I went through surgery to help me lose weight and now I'm scared my tool is going to have to be taken away because I can't eat band friendly things. I've scheduled an appt with the nutritionist, Ruth, for next Tuesday. Hopefully, she can point me in the right direction and help me not to survive on gummy bears since sugar seems to be the only thing I can eat. WTF is that about, FML!!
Wednesday, July 27, 2011
I've been working at Lane Bryant again, so far just 1-2 days a week and that's enough for me. It's pocket change, discounted clothes for the shrinking and something to do til we move back to GA at the end of the year. Yes, yes ya'll I'm going home!! I'm so happy to get out of TX, I can't stand this heat, 28 straight days of temps above 100! Somebody tell Mother Nature I'm gonna kick her ass if we don't get a break and some damn rain!! I can't make myself go anywhere near a gym and I'm not disciplined enough to work out at home so what's a girl to do. I tried some pilates on netflix yesterday, I didn't like the instructor. I'm probably gonna end up playing some music and muting the tv. At least 10 min of pilates will tighten some things up, not sure how to get cardio in, I know that I know that I know I will NOT do that at home. Maybe sex can substitute, I"ll have to tell hubby 3x a week so I can keep my cardiovascular fitness up :)
My NSV's for this past month, my size 18 jeans are loose, even after washing, I have to wear a belt with them AND my belt is 5 holes tighter than when I started this journey. Work was doing a special and I got a pair of the new jeggings in a 14, my intention is to wear them once the weather breaks but the 16 felt too loose to last that long. OMG a 14!! I haven't worn a 14 since.........hell I don't remember, that's an NSV in itself!
Ok friends, til next time
Thursday, July 14, 2011
I'm alive, just feeling like crap. I had allergy testing June 23 and ain't been right since. 2 weeks ago I started snotting, ok, summer cold I can handle this. then I started coughing, ugh, I hate coughing....wtf this cough is dry and unproductive. I can't sleep, I can barely walk to the car cuz i'm coughing so much. I go to the doc and they're like 'Oh, it's just an allergy attack here's an inhaler, steroid and decongestant. You'll be fine in a few days' Uh, no. It's a frigging week later on meds and 2 weeks since the start of this crap, I'm not fine, if anything I'm worse. The cough is making me gag and my left eye looks suspiciously like conjunctivitis. I think I have lung-junk-tivitis. somebody better figure this shit out, I'm so tired of being sick and tired. I guess it's not all bad, my weight is still dropping, about 1.5lb a week since last TOM. That's usually when I gain, and the past 2 months had been ridiculous, I didn't gain but I couldn't lose either. Anywho, I went to a doc yesterday and he says it's allergies but it's more like allergic asthma, that's why I'm coughing so much and here's another Rx. This time it's Singulair, I think this is probably the better one as opposed to the decongestant. This morning I wake up coughing up my guts, spitting bubbles, it was so much like the frothy crap that comes before a PB, it was miserable. I have my Pharmacy Tech final tomorrow, I cannot walk in there tomorrow morning cradling a trashcan, that would not be cool. I think I'm done whining now, my weight is still dropping, I'm drinking plenty water because the meds are drying me out so bad and it's been 105 outside for the past 2 weeks. I'm so excited to hopefully be on my way back to GA at the end of the year, if I could fast forward 4 months, it would be better weather in TX and I'd be that much closer to going home and being a place with friends and family and a life outside of the military.
the military lifestyle is overrated
Sunday, June 19, 2011
Monday, June 13, 2011
Sunday, June 5, 2011
Monday, May 30, 2011
I know I have some fears about loose skin that have already become reality but I honestly can't say I'm surprised. My thighs are a mess!! I've always had large thighs even when I was 120lbs 15 years ago, my mom has big thighs. She had GB 18mos ago has lost 150lbs and she wears spanx to hold it all together. I'm sad to know that's probably my future because I can't imagine having to wear spanx thru the TX summer but dammit if it helps my smaller clothes look better on my shrinking body, I'll do what I have to do.
So to Maria and anyone else in reset mode, let's do this! We have lived with this weight long enough to decide that we had had enough of carrying it around and had surgery to help the process. It's time to work with this band, minimize the self sabotage and let the weight and it's grip on our self-perception go!
This week I'm going to work on a baby quilt for a shower June 11 and this Friday is my birthday! Hopefully it won't be too stressful since I'll be spending the bulk of it in the classroom. My professor said she'll make this one of our pizza days and use school $ to feed us, I'm gonna take cupcakes. There are only 8 of us in this class I feel comfortable sharing this with them, after all it is my 30th birthday. Our plan is to go to an early movie Saturday and that's it, no parties, no alcohol (maybe), just hubby and the kids. A quiet day doing the one thing I really wanna do and it allows us to be a couple for a few hours then we can come home and be a family of 4. I think Saturday would be a good day for progress photos, I'm sure there has to be a visual difference by now!
Friday, May 20, 2011
Just wanted to give a quick update. I need to get my butt to bed, I have class in the morning.
Thursday, May 19, 2011
I ended up not doing the 5K Saturday in my city, I horsed around with hubby and when he tossed me to the couch I landed wrong and had a nice bruise on my hip. It didn't really bother me til I did Zumba but dammit did it hurt after class! I decided it was easier to move around in a gym than to walk 3 mi through downtown where I wasn't sure of the route and stuff.
Well, what else? Hubby is taking classes or something for work and if he snaps at me one mo'gin, he gon' wake up missing an eyebrow or something! I hate when his work consumes him that way, he becomes such a prick, I'm tolerant in the beginning, when he gets quiet but he seems to always start talking before he's gotten over his pissy-spell, and that's when the storm begins. I hope it passes quickly. Now that I know he's in a classroom all day, I can modify my goings ons to make sure he has quick breakfast/lunch foods since he hardly gets a lunch break and I can make more effort to cook something healthy and hearty for dinner, be the housewife of his dreams for a week or so. I'm accommodating.......sometimes. Honestly ya'll I suck at this housewife thing, I had never considered staying home until I was pregnant with my son, it was nice the first 2 years. He was 18mos when I got pregnant with my daughter, ok, another year home, I can handle it. It'll be fun getting to see their relationship evolve. And it has been, but now they seem to be in a routine with each other, she is saying new words each day and I'm ready to go to work. I feel selfish for wanting to run away but me time should not be the hours between 10p-1a. Can I get some daylight hours to be Rahshell and put my Mommy hat on the shelf? July 29, can't come soon enough, classes will be over and I will have registered to take the PTCB. Hopefully I'll be working in the time between finishing class and taking the test. We'll see how that goes. I had my 2nd midterm last week, not sure what my grade is yet but that's part of the reason I've been short on posts. Reading up for class this Friday is why I'm up now. good gracious it's midnight!!
Monday, May 9, 2011
It went well!! Karen and I met up with a few other ladies for the drive to Austin. We got to the location problem free and were raring to go. The Mothers Milk Bank had a nice setup for nursing and some changing tables, of course the table with information about breastfeeding. A little after 9am the ladies from the bank were ready to get going, we left with the second wave. The walk was through downtown Austin and we pretty much strolled and did some sightseeing. We took about 90min to complete the course. The hills on Congress and Lavaca were f*%$ing stupid but the start and finish on the bridge was pretty. I got my MMB tshirt and was pleasantly surprised, it's an XL and has slack around my hips!! We're gonna do the walk this coming Saturday in Killeen and this time I'll take my family along. Hopefully hubby will get some good pictures of us.
Y'all, I have never participated in anything like this and I have no experience with losing a child or having on in NICU. The emotion and love and support was palpable, almost overwhelming. There were signs at the chute that had words from parents to their angels and my gosh it was so touching. Karen's friend had lost a baby this January and she broke down and cried, I couldn't remember her name all day but I felt so protective of her, primal, like her pain was mine and I took it personally. At some point we all teared up. It was emotional and cleansing and it makes me feels so proud of the parents and babies who have fought long and hard to be healthy and it made me feel blessed to have my healthy children. I learned the March of Dimes is in support of ALL babies, full-term, pre-term, with and without health concerns and their goal is to see babies born healthy, and to support the families of those babies. I feel like I'm rambling so I'm gonna go. Check out the pics :) The Brylie is the doll I'm walking for, Karen had her at 29 weeks, she is 6 months old now
After the March
Monday, April 25, 2011
On my hotsexymama quest, I've PB'd 2x since my last fill, first time I was probably eating too fast but the second time I'm not so sure. I took a bite, chased a kid, took another bite and got all slimy and sick and stuff. I'm torn between thinking it's too tight and not tight enough, it varies day to day and it's a big variance. Some days, I haven't been able to tolerate white meats AT ALL, no matter the preparation, it could be stewed and I'd still feel choked up. On other days I can eat whatever I want. It's one hell of a learning curve. I was expecting TOM last weekend and felt like hell and doggonit I checked my calendar and it's not due til this week. Energy is low, sleep is terrible and I've not been working out like I should. However, I do bench press the baby LOL I think she's put on a few pounds, my arms are sore after our session today. It's crazy how I've incorporated the kids into my little moments of strength training. I put my son across my lap and do leg raises for lower abs, I hold Liv over my head and 'bench press' her. Joe will lay on the floor with me and do yoga moves. He get so excited for me to 'move my body' it's such a great motivator and I know I'm being that example for him and Liv to lead active lifestyles.
don't forget about the March for Babies 5K in Austin May 7. Ya'll pray I get some mileage in this week, I'm feeling weak, hips hurting and such. I know I need to make sure my body is primed for this event, I do not want to embarrass myself LOL
Thursday, April 21, 2011
Visit my page and give a dollar or 5.
Thanks a bunch
Tuesday, April 19, 2011
Thursday, April 14, 2011
Ever feel like your fill isn't working? Like maybe you were unfilled a bit but it was done under flouro and you drank lthe junk to check things out. I am having the damndest time with ALL white meats, pork chicken etc, but that started before fill 2. Now the scale has gone up to 237, has been there since Monday. I'm befuddled. Guess it's time to journal my foods again.
Saturday, April 9, 2011
I went to the gym yesterday, 1mi on the treadmill and 2mi on the bike! I was having a frustrating Friday and usually the gym time would make me feel better but nope. This morning I was still kinda grumpy and Hubby suggested we go out for breakfast, eh ok. That went ok, then the boy wanted to walk around 'the circle' aka Target :) Cracker Barrel is in the same shopping plaza.
I decided this evening that I wanted to go out for a 'run' again. Hubby was like, sure, do your thing. I wanted to do the 2.2mi loop but ended up doing 1.56. The first stretch of road doesn't have sidewalks and lots of rocks in the grass because of construction going on, I started jogging and stepped on a rock and almost rolled my ankle. I have weak ankles to begin with so that made the next stretch tough. I decided to turn one corner sooner just to ensure I didn't get caught far from home in a lot of pain. Anywho, I headed back and found some sidewalk :D that made me really happy so I jogged a bit more. The next corner was HELL into the wind and uphill for 1/4mile, I had to push . . . hhhhard. It was one hell of a way to finish up a quick walk. Took me right at 30 minutes, so I feel my time was pretty good. Maybe I should sign up for the 5k that's coming up, hold on let me check the date.......*insert Jeopardy theme music* Aww hell, it's next weekend. Not confident I can do the distance without crapping out : / To be honest with myself, I'm scared of not finishing. We'll see, I might grow a pair and register online this week, or not.
The scale is holding tight at 235, this is one hell of a place to have a plateau. Note to self, can I get these 2lbs off to meet my 30 lbs goal, please, pretty please.
Tuesday, April 5, 2011
The fill appointment probably won't result in a fill since my weight loss has been pretty steady per my scale. Since I'll already be at the hospital with hubby, I'm keeping my appt, it's just on another floor.
~til next time
Friday, April 1, 2011
Eating is good, slow but satisfying and my choices are reasonable. Today, I ran to the Shoppette(the gas station on the base) and grabbed a Lunchable and Grandma's peanut butter cookies, you know they come in packs of 2. It probably took me 30 min to eat but whatever, I ate 1 cookie with lunch (mmmm, it was delicious!) The other one on my ride to pick up my Liv from the sitter, 3 hours after our lunch break. Now it's time for dinner and I'm getting a little hungry. But I kind of hoped hubby would have been home by now so we could go out for dinner *sigh* not so lucky today.
On another note, OMG learning all the drugs, actions and categories is going to melt my brain!! Does it ever get easier?!
*LCK glad you stopped by, it's great to still have your support! You helped me get this process started, thank you.
Tuesday, March 29, 2011
I'm at 237!
Sunday, March 27, 2011
Thursday, March 24, 2011
fast forward to tonight:
Him: I don't understand why that's called a productive burp. Isn't a burp already productive because gas comes out?
Me: Well, that's the name for it in the lap band community, productive burp or PB
Him: That's just gross, PB my ass. That wasn't a burp, if food comes up that's straight vomit!
Me: laughing, you know I'm gonna blog about this
Him: Yeah, probably. Just make sure you spell my name right!
who is this crazy man in my house, I probably couldn't eat my damn rice for laughing at him last night. My Mommy will be here this Friday!!!
Ok, I'm gonna go to bed, there's a zumba class at 1pm. I hear it's not as crowded AND child care is still provided on site. If it's lame, I'll be at the 530p class to make up for it :)
Tuesday, March 22, 2011
On another note, I went to support group this morning with my girl Jo, she's considering surgery. She was initially thinking band but at group she learned about sleeve. I love the group conversation, it is for all the procedures so she learned about sleeve this morning. There is an official weigh in at EVERY group and I'm 237.8 on their scale!! That's 5 lbs in 2 weeks, last weigh in was the day of my fill. On the form we fill out each visit, there is a line item that asks for an NSV, I was able to tighten my belt 3 notches from pre-op weight :-)
I'm gonna ask ya'll like I asked the group this morning: anybody have wonky periods after surgery? My first (.) post op was almost 10 days late. It's past time for the next and I don't feel achy, crampy, pms-y or anything. Whaddya think?
Saturday, March 19, 2011
Baby girl got shots around 3 pm yesterday. She's been a raging fool ever since. Today my big boy has an allergic reaction to what must have been Life and hes itchy and whiny. No one has a fever and they only act crazy with me. AND today was hubby's day out, alone so I've been dealing with this solo, ugh I need a bottle of moscato . . .
Friday, March 18, 2011
Zumba. I'm pretty sad about it but I have good reason, we spent ALL DAMN day at the Automax and finally took home a 2011 Ford Escape! Im so excited it's my first brand new car, she only had 36 miles and some of that was my test drive. It stunk that I missed zumba but hello I needed to eat and settle a bit before that cardio. As it was, we skipped lunch and snacked on free drinks, krispy creams and split 2 string cheese sticks 3 ways. Hubby was a real trooper he's never bought a car with financing and a trade in. And my sweet baby girl was just hanging out and greeting folks like it was her job. We spent a total of maybe 7 hours there. It was about 630 when we got home, starving and frustrated at the stupid car buying process. I have cpr class in the am so I miss yoga too dangit! I'll be shaking my booty in zumba Saturday and hopefully I can get a swim in this weekend too. I need to keep moving so as not to lose momentum.
The scale made me smile this evening, I didn't weigh this morning because it's hard to see the end of day higher. I saw 238.2 as a bedtime weight!! That's lower than my lowest morning :-) I'm tempted to see what the scale says in the morning but i'd hate to ruin my high. I'll try to hold out til tomorrow night. . . .we'll see
Tuesday, March 15, 2011
Sunday, March 13, 2011
Thanks for being here
Saturday, March 12, 2011
In the right direction finally! The scale, it went down! I hit 239 the other day but floated back up to 243 where I hovered before. Yesterday I weighed 242 and this morning. . . 238.8!! My lowest to date, this is how much I weighed the day I had my daughter, a year and 2 weeks ago.
I know y'all say feeling a fill takes time and I understand this could be residual swelling but for right now, I'm in a great place. Yesterday started with a was myoplex chocolate shake with 25g protein, lunch was a small blt cobb salad from Wendy's, dinner was a small chili. I bought the 2 for 4.99 at lunch. We finished lunch about 1230 and I wasn't hungry until 530. I don't think I've just not been hungry that long before, it was a great realization.
I'm taking lil dude to a birthday party this afternoon and we haven't gotten a gift yet :-o so we're gonna spend some mother/son time looking for something.
Have a fantastic weekend
Friday, March 11, 2011
Wednesday, March 9, 2011
I'm typing on my phone plz forgive any typos.
Dr A did a good fill, 4.5ccs. He says I have the standard band so I'm guessing 10cc total. It was pretty cool and not as uncomfortable as I thought it would be. He uses flouroscopy and a local anesthetic. I felt the pop as he hit the port but nothing else. I'm waiting the standard 30 min before Olivia and I leave, and so far no problems drinking my water.
Tuesday, March 8, 2011
Tomorrow I get my first fill, I can't wait to see how my body responds to the fill plus the exercising. I'm all smiles.
Monday, March 7, 2011
Saturday, March 5, 2011
It all started Tuesday morning when the little one woke with fever, she's a clingy, crying mess when she's sick so that was a cuddle day. Wednesday, the same thing, fever, fussing, clinging, blech, I'm ready for this illness to be done. Thursday no fever but dstill crying and clinging to me, I cannot stand to have a kid that screams if she's not being held, that's a fate worse than death to me. I mean, I couldn't put her down at my feet to stir a pot, it was insane. Thursday evening, daycare calls at 5:15 saying my son has pink-eye and it's been draining all day. Uh, HELLO if it's been draining all day, why did you wait til the end of the fracking day to call and say something is wrong!? I can't make an appointment on post after 4 pm and that's on a prayer we'll get a same day appt in the after hours clinic and I HAVE A MIDTERM TOMORROW!! Cheese and crackers it was frustrating. I told hubby he was gonna have to go to work late, I have got to take my test, BTW I got an 86 :) Friday, I take the baby to my friend who watches her when I'm in class and go take my test. Hubby takes the boy to check on his eye, yuck, it is pinkeye and he has drops. My day started at 7am and since I don't work that was too early. I came home and both kids took naps, instead of me resting, I worked out. Yay me, Gold's Gym, Cardio on the Wii is awesome! Towards the end of the session a girlfriend calls and we end up eating at Cheddars(junk) walking through Target and it's after 9pm when the kids and I get home. I'm beyond tired and the weekend has just begun. Today I started with getting my nails done at 10, I hit Walmart for groceries, and searched Hobby Lobby AND Dollar General looking for a $500 bill refrigerator magnet, no luck. After a quick shower about 1:30, I hit a Tupperware party at 2, a baby shower at 2:30 and then hit 2 stores to
In the midst of all of this, my eating has been crap but the scale hasn't moved any more than the 2 lbs that have been flopping around every day for the past couple weeks. I have realized I'm drinking when I eat, what started as a sip became a full on glass 'o water while I'm eating. My hunger comes back within 2 hours, and that has got to stop. So as I step away from the meal/beverage combo, I'm mentally preparing myself for my first fill and 2 days of liquids. I'm really excited to get this fill, I can really feel a difference between the post op restriction and now. I'm able to eat whatever though not as much BUT it's still not as much as I could or would eat pre-band. Thank goodness my self control has tried to hang in there despite the eating and drinking.
Geez, I've typed a whole novel!! I'm gonna watch the rest of Iron Chef and go to bed, it's been a long few days and it's not over yet
Friday, March 4, 2011
Wednesday, March 2, 2011
I'm kicking myself that I didn't take measurements at the start because I'm certain there are a good many inches gone since then.
Highest Weight - 263
Current Weight - 241
Goal Weight - 170
My weight hasn't moved in probably 2 weeks, it stalled right when (.) was supposed to show. It was 2 weeks late and that's odd in and of itself. Hopefully once it ends, my weight will start to drop again.
Bust - 38, down from 42
Waist - 43
Hips - 51, they've been 51 since HS
L Thigh - 30
R Thigh - 33(weird I know)
L Arm - 16.5
R Arm - 16.5
Tuesday, March 1, 2011
Sunday, February 27, 2011
I quit a full time job to be a stay at home mommy oh ... 4 years ago. I had a part time gig at Lane Bryant before quitting so I always had something to do. Jan '08 our son was born and 8 months later we moved to TX. I hadn't worked at all since being here until this past November when I started working for Lane Bryant again. I figured it would be good for a few dollars through the holiday season. I dunno, maybe 2 kids and 2+ years changed me but I don't think I'm cut out for retail anymore, or maybe I outgrew it.
Before, I was a maniac shopper, I have more clothes in my closet than I have reason to wear, it doesn't help that my employee discount is 40% either. So back to today, I worked I looked at all the pretty things and felt out of place. I didn't want to look through those things and find the perfect item for me. It feels wrong to shop, I can see the future and clothes from LB aren't there. I'm not gonna lie, the spring line is really pretty and I can't wait to buy new bras and panties but clothes are not a priority.
Last year my mom had gastric bypass, she was a size smaller than me last spring, now she's dropped 2 more sizes. When she visits next month, I'm getting her summer stuff. I have no reason to shop for clothes, between the things I have and the things she's bringing, I'm set til probably a size 14. I'm currently a 22.
I feel like I'm rambling but I guess I needed to get this out. Hi, I'm a shopaholic that doesn't want to shop for myself. I'm really excited to go through my closet and pull out things that are too big. I'm all for sending clothes to someone who needs it next. Since most of my stuff is LB it's hard for me to donate, I'd rather give them directly to someone, those clothes have a special place in my heart. That's probably why I have so many clothes, in so many sizes, taking up so much space......
Saturday, February 26, 2011
As far as food journaling goes, I ate 1192 1 day and 1248 the next, not bad I think.
til next time
Friday, February 25, 2011
For me and my still unnamed band, I've decided to journal my food. I'm not sure if I am gonna post it here or if I can stay honest with myself on paper. I'm thinking to stay between 1100-1300 and see how that goes for me. I weighed 240 this morning and I've been writing 2 days worth. How do I figure out the calories of meals made from scratch? I used all fresh ingredients last night so that hasn't been written in. Today I ate packaged foods and stayed very conscious of calories and protein but feel hungry a lot sooner. I'm befuddled. I haven't had my first fill, that's scheduled March 9, oh snap that's in less than 2 weeks!! I'll be about 6.5 weeks PO. I'm guessing since my hunger returns in 2.5-3 hours Dr Acheson might be conservative with my fill. I dunno, he doesn't do the support groups, those are run by the Nutritionist. Hell I didn't meet the man (very handsome, southern man) until my pre-op appointment, oh 2 days before surgery. Gotta love the military.
I'm gonna go figure out what to have for an actual dinner, I don't wanna blow my calories on snacking.
Wednesday, February 23, 2011
Tuesday, February 22, 2011
Other stuff :
Uh, I have a husband of 4 years 2 kids and a dog. We're a military family and I'm praying we get to leave Texas soon, our families are too far away and we're all allergic to this place, including the dog :/